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Living with ADHD

I haven’t talked about my ADHD diagnosis with many outside of my family.

I managed for almost 20 years, not particularly well, but I did my best to push through it without medication. I didn’t want to ask for help.

You wouldn’t know I had a diagnosed mental disorder, I would never have shown it outwardly, but I suffered in secret. Feeling like a failure when I couldn’t stay consistent with anything (if you’ve been around for a hot second, you’ve seen my many failed weightloss attempts), forgot almost everything, couldn’t suppress my impulses (I’ve learned as I’ve aged, and my impulses have changed), felt chronically overwhelmed by everything.

Until 2020. Until I had to stop, and face myself.

Last year was brutal, we all know that. It kicked us below the belt on numerous occasions.

For me, it made doing the basics almost impossible, routine non existent, my feeling of being overwhelmed from a 3 to about a 20. ALL. THE. TIME.

It kicked all of my ADHD symptoms into highest gear and could no longer “manage”, I needed help.

Absolutely no shame in my seeking help and guidance game now!

I’m on new meds, allowing the time needed for them to level off in my body, and feeling a weight off my shoulders.

What you see and what I feel are not so opposite now. I still have to watch triggers, work to stay on task, accept that I may fail, but that’s all of us in some way or another.

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